1990 EXUP genuine standard exhaust silencer
It is in the best finish combination of burnt stainless and white chrome.
In return for the best joke or ode posted.
.
.
.
.
.
.
It had a scrape that I've dressed out, otherwise as new.
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.
.
.
Free silencer
Free silencer
Free to a good home
1990 EXUP genuine standard exhaust silencer
It is in the best finish combination of burnt stainless and white chrome.
In return for the best joke or ode posted.
.
.
.
.
.
.
It had a scrape that I've dressed out, otherwise as new.
.
.
.
.
1990 EXUP genuine standard exhaust silencer
It is in the best finish combination of burnt stainless and white chrome.
In return for the best joke or ode posted.
.
.
.
.
.
.
It had a scrape that I've dressed out, otherwise as new.
.
.
.
.
1992 RU midnight blue, Wiseco 1070, 6 speed, r1 calipers, ducati discs , 157 bhp crank, Ohlins shock
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undeadhairy
- Test Rider
- Posts: 325
- Joined: Tue Aug 06, 2013 3:10 pm
- Location: hull. east yorkshire
My wife, children and I have been sitting upstairs in our Somerset home, totally cut off from the outside world, with the downstairs flooded for the last five weeks.
Today the Red Cross pulled up outside in a boat.
"Thank God!" I shouted "Have you come to save us?"
"No," They replied "We're collecting donations for Syria
Today the Red Cross pulled up outside in a boat.
"Thank God!" I shouted "Have you come to save us?"
"No," They replied "We're collecting donations for Syria
God said,
"Adam, I want you to do something for Me."
Adam said,
"Gladly, Lord, what do you want me to do?"
God said,
"Go down into that valley."
Adam said,
"What's a valley?"
God explained it to him.
Then God said,
"Cross the river."
Adam said,
"What's a river?"
God explained that
to him, and then said,
"Go over to the hill...."
Adam said,
"What is a hill?"
So, God explained to Adam what a hill was.
He told Adam,
"On the other side of the hill you will find a cave."
Adam said,
"What's a cave?"
After God explained,
He said, "In the cave you will find a woman."
Adam said,
"What's a woman?"
So God explained
that to him, too.
Then, God said,
"I want you to
reproduce."
Adam said,
"How do I do that?"
God first said (under his breath), "Geez....."
And then,
just like everything else, God explained that to Adam, as well.
So, Adam goes down into the valley,
across the river, and
over the hill, into the cave, and finds the woman.
Then, in
about five minutes, he was back.
God, his patience
wearing thin,
said angrily,
"What is it now?"
And Adam said....
"What's a migrane?"
"Adam, I want you to do something for Me."
Adam said,
"Gladly, Lord, what do you want me to do?"
God said,
"Go down into that valley."
Adam said,
"What's a valley?"
God explained it to him.
Then God said,
"Cross the river."
Adam said,
"What's a river?"
God explained that
to him, and then said,
"Go over to the hill...."
Adam said,
"What is a hill?"
So, God explained to Adam what a hill was.
He told Adam,
"On the other side of the hill you will find a cave."
Adam said,
"What's a cave?"
After God explained,
He said, "In the cave you will find a woman."
Adam said,
"What's a woman?"
So God explained
that to him, too.
Then, God said,
"I want you to
reproduce."
Adam said,
"How do I do that?"
God first said (under his breath), "Geez....."
And then,
just like everything else, God explained that to Adam, as well.
So, Adam goes down into the valley,
across the river, and
over the hill, into the cave, and finds the woman.
Then, in
about five minutes, he was back.
God, his patience
wearing thin,
said angrily,
"What is it now?"
And Adam said....
"What's a migrane?"
Bit of advice. Buy a good bed and a good pair of shoes, because if you aren't in one you'll be in the other.
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pilninggas
- Lap Record Holder
- Posts: 492
- Joined: Sun Jan 29, 2006 1:58 pm
- Location: West Beirut
SNOW JOKE
Been snowing here (no floods fortunately)
It's a real pretty winter scene in the garden and the missus has been looking through the patio window all day - suppose I'd better let her in soon.
It's a real pretty winter scene in the garden and the missus has been looking through the patio window all day - suppose I'd better let her in soon.
IF IT AIN'T BROKE - FIX IT 'TILL IT IS.
No, make something up and you might win it .hammiegt wrote:can I not just give you some cash for it?? need a decent can, have you seen the icbm launcher I have on the side of mine, [that's gotta be a pretty good joke in itself] take pity on me, I can only ride it in the dark at the moment as I cannot face the ridicule, seriously can I buy
cheers hammie
1992 RU midnight blue, Wiseco 1070, 6 speed, r1 calipers, ducati discs , 157 bhp crank, Ohlins shock
How to make yourself look a complete twat!!!
few years back in the summer, walking my girls up to their primary school, grabbed my shades, put them on and off we went , wondered why up at the gates I was getting a lot of odd looks from other parents, drop kids off and walk home, get thru the front door and my wifes says, "what you doing?" I replied I didn't know what she meant, she said you only have one lens in your sunglasses!!! and I take them off and theres one lens missing, twat lol, try it if you have an old pair, take a lens out put them on, and your eyes cannot detect its missing, strange but true.
twat 2, many years ago when I was in the army, we were changing over from the old 7.62 slr rifle to the new sa80 5.56, it came with a new fangled sling which enabled it to be carried in many different ways and left you with your hands free but still with your weapon at hand, one of my qualifications was a small arms weapons instructor, and had been trained up on the new rifle and we were demoing it to the commanding officer and his fellow rodneys, prior to converting the regt over to it, after doing an excellent instruction on how to assemble and use the sling I went for the final demo of how quick and easily it could be removed from its rear slung position, went for the one quick flash movement to show how great and competent I was, I caught on the webbing on my back and couldn't unsnag it, the CO came forward and untangled me and asked if I would like to try it again!!!
best I can do mr creed lol,
few years back in the summer, walking my girls up to their primary school, grabbed my shades, put them on and off we went , wondered why up at the gates I was getting a lot of odd looks from other parents, drop kids off and walk home, get thru the front door and my wifes says, "what you doing?" I replied I didn't know what she meant, she said you only have one lens in your sunglasses!!! and I take them off and theres one lens missing, twat lol, try it if you have an old pair, take a lens out put them on, and your eyes cannot detect its missing, strange but true.
twat 2, many years ago when I was in the army, we were changing over from the old 7.62 slr rifle to the new sa80 5.56, it came with a new fangled sling which enabled it to be carried in many different ways and left you with your hands free but still with your weapon at hand, one of my qualifications was a small arms weapons instructor, and had been trained up on the new rifle and we were demoing it to the commanding officer and his fellow rodneys, prior to converting the regt over to it, after doing an excellent instruction on how to assemble and use the sling I went for the final demo of how quick and easily it could be removed from its rear slung position, went for the one quick flash movement to show how great and competent I was, I caught on the webbing on my back and couldn't unsnag it, the CO came forward and untangled me and asked if I would like to try it again!!!
best I can do mr creed lol,
That made me laugh hammiegt. It reminded me the day (many years ago) I took my car in for some work doing at a town called Selby. When I dropped the car off the mechanic said come for it tomorrow so that meant me going home on a bus. It was market day at Selby so I had a walk round till it was time to get my bus. I saw a hamburger stall and it was one of those that served big burgers. I got the burger and as you do I lathered it with tomato ketchup. After I'd finished it and was walking to the bus station. I noticed I was getting funny looks from folk. I didn't know why? Got on the bus and got same funny looks. I was sat there a bit puzzled. When I got home and went to the bathroom I looked in the mirror and I just looked like Heath Ledger as the joker on Batman.
The tomato sauce had gone all around my face just like this fella. .
The tomato sauce had gone all around my face just like this fella. .
Bit of advice. Buy a good bed and a good pair of shoes, because if you aren't in one you'll be in the other.
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willandrip
- Test Rider
- Posts: 291
- Joined: Fri Aug 10, 2012 8:50 am
- Location: Tyne & Wear
A hippie gets onto a bus and sits next to a nun in the front seat. The hippie looks over and asks the nun if she would have sex with him. The nun, surprised by the question, politely declines and gets off at the next stop. When the bus starts again, the bus driver says to the hippie, "If you want, I can tell you how you can get that nun to have sex with you." The hippie of course says that he'd love to know, so the bus driver tells him that every Tuesday evening at midnight the nun goes to the cemetery to pray to the lord. "If you went dressed in robes and some glowing powder," says the bus driver, "You could tell her you were God and command her to have sex with you." The hippie decides to try this out. That Tuesday, he goes to the cemetery and waits for the nun. Right on schedule, the nun shows up. While she's in the middle of praying, the hippie walks out from hiding, in robes and glowing with a mask of god. "I am God, I have heard your prayers and I will answer them but you must have sex with me first," he says. The nun agrees but asks for anal sex so she might keep her virginity. The hippie agrees to this and quickly sets about having sex with the nun. After the hippie finishes, he rips off his mask and shouts out, "Ha ha, I'm the hippie! " The nun replies by whipping off her mask and shouting, "Ha ha, I'm the bus driver!"
Endeavour to persevere.